Thursday, September 24, 2009

Apparently there is some kind of piracy problem

Being called a pirate makes me want to download everything I can. (Old childhood dream) next to being a vampire, Ninja turtle, and Chuck Norris (all true by the way)

It was said that Dan Browns ‘The Lost Symbol’ was pirated hours before its actual release. It was reported that this was a huge problem; apparently Dan Brown also broke some kind of sales record.

Apparently Kanye West bought all of his family and friends ‘whips’ and he wasn’t talking about Volvo’s either. If having my music/book/movies pirated online means I can buy my family cars……then by all means, steal my music. Jay Z and Beyonce apparently have no problems with music piracy.

NEXT! can suck (it)

I have been trying to make my book as legitimate as possible, I want to sell a lot of books, and I want a lot of people to read my work. I don’t want a lot of people to pay a lot for it. I was going to self publish through but in order to do this, I have to sell it at a ridiculous amount.

Uneditied and minimal chapters, and pages my books is running 15.50 on amazon. com DO NOT BUY MY BOOK (YET)

Selling my book for 15.50 makes me sick, is it worth it? I think yes, but I don’t want people to pay that amount. Also, selling the book for 15.50 on makes me 1 dollar. How ridiculous is that? (If you’ll allow me to use ‘ridiculous’ twice) will allow me to sell the same book, for 13.60 to also make the same amount of money. This is where the price will most likely stay (unfortunately) and anyone who buys it, I thank you and appreciate it.

If I were to pay 40 dollars, I think I can sell my book for ten dollars, which that was my target price.

Eventually I want to start an account with lightning source, and then if I can get away with selling the book cheaper I will. I only want to make a dollar over the price of the book, so I don’t know. Hopefully soonish I can set up with lightning source, and then all those agents who turned me down can suck it. I will sell this book in large numbers, all while giving away free copies too.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Monday, September 21, 2009

nice cake!

this is in no way anything to do with anything. but its funny.

This is how I imagine the conversation went.

Wal-mart worker bee:
Hey, welcomes to wal-marts. What you need?

I need a cake, for a going away party.

Wal-mart worker bee:
Coo, we got cakes.

I need it to say, ‘best wishes Suzanne’ underneath that
‘we will miss you.’

did you notice the "underneath that was spelled incorrectly and as two words?

I was emailed this picture. BUT, my wife and I went to a wal-mart, and attemped to purchase a cake, we wanted it to say
‘happy birthday daddy!”
What it said was,
‘happy birt day dady’
And the writing looked like the kid who wrote it had turrets syndrome. Oh and the “happy” you could see he almost spelled it “happi” but gracefully caught his mistake.
If the obvious spelling errors weren’t enough, he paraded the cake out to me and my wife, and presented it, as a job well done.

while at the customer service desk, i made a joke saying "at least the kid spelled 'day' correctly." and was told to shut up and not be mean...........

Saturday, September 19, 2009

why so serious

How do you know, if a query is a bad one? I know for a fact my first couple queries were terrible. But the latest one, I keep hearing how intriguing it is, how interesting it is. Actually I got that quite a few times with the first couple I sent out.
I can’t take an agent not being interested in the work as my query being bad. What if the Agent just didn’t like the ideas I was conveying? I mean, the manuscript is a vampire/zombie suspense/horror I don’t like the sub genres but it’s not quite a horror, and its more horror than suspense. Therefore I represent both.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

query of my

Ugh, I have been feeling sick for a while.

Whenever I submit queries, I feel a little sick.
I sent out 4 queries today, I wanted to do more but when I wrote my first query, I sent It to about a thousand agents (exaggeration)
but I did send it to a lot of them.
Which was stupid I know now, because instead of sending less than 5 agents a bad query at least 20 have a bad query which apparently I won’t be able to re-submit.

And the first ten agents I sent out queries to had mistakes and missed periods, I sent one agent a line something close to.
“And thanks (random name) again, for reading my query)
and then something like,
(random name) Mr.
*yes I did put the name before the Mr. it was a saved letter and I put the name in as a form…..
wow Erick good effen game. But you make mistakes so you can learn from them.

Deep down I feel as though I am going to get rejected.
Speaking of rejection my last was brutal
it came with heavy off toned paper,

“Unfortunately this is such a busy time for me that I can really only afford to take on work about which I feel most passionate. I’m afraid that your letter just didn’t inspire me the proper amount of enthusiasm. Please bear in mind that this is only one opinion and I am sure you’ll find someone for whom this is the perfect project.
I wish you every success with this book.

See, I have been a more to love kind of guy most of my life, and when I would come home crying because the pretty girl in school wouldn’t talk to me, my mother would always say something reminiscing this letter.
“Honey one day you will find the perfect girl who you will make happy.”
Well I married a straight fox, and if this letter holds as true as my mother words I’m looking at Stephen King publishing.

Which honestly I wrote a damn good book, sucks for you random agency who wrote that letter. I will get the last laugh.

Monday, September 14, 2009



more rejectors

another rejection letter, my 30th or so and MAN DO I FEEL GREAT!
my wife has hidden all the knives ans sharp things from me.

agents keep them coming it makes me feel good about myself........

Friday, September 11, 2009 is some bunk BS,

When I am finished editing, I will initially sell my book on for only a moment. Till I figure out and then I won’t be happy.

Lightning source will print my book for about 4 dollars. That isn’t bad.

Lulu and createspsace both use the POD lightning source.

To make a dollar from I need to sell my book for $15.30 which is about 5.30 more than I wanted to sell for. I feel my book is worth ten dollars. requires about 40 percent, so from 15.30 405% is about $6.10 that leaves $9.20 which………. Take away the 4 something it costs to print and your left with 5 dollars. Lulu takes $4.10? I get one dollar. LULU.COM literally doesn’t do anything, they just sign your book into and lightning source does all the work.

I guess it makes sense, but if I went to lightning source alone as a publisher, I would get the 4.10 lulu would get, and the dollar. Not to mention, I could sell the book for about 10 bucks, and still only make a dollar if sold on because they would take 40% from 10 to make it, 4 dollars. It would cost 4 to make, and I would walk with 2 bucks.

This would make me more money, and would allow people to purchase the book for only 10 dollars.

Here is the problem; it costs 100 dollars to set up a lightning source account, and 100 more for an ISBN, so I am forced to sell through createspace until make at least enough to pay for lightning source…… ouch. That’s 200 copies…. But I want to sell 3,000 so I will just have to market the crap out of it.

Thursday, September 10, 2009


It makes me sick to my belly, (and it’s a big one)

That I cannot get an agent, or a publisher. I have two publishing houses I would really like to query but they only do mail submissions and you need to send in the whole manuscript. I am not in a position to print out a full manuscript yet.

The starving artist, listed as my occupation (not a joke)

As this goes on, and my hopes and dreams dwindle the rants will get longer and more violent. I do not need two blogs, but is was intended to be my publisher blog, as I am working on starting my own indie publishing company. I figure if I can self publish a book and sell 3k copies a publisher or agent will have to take me seriously.

But has inadvertently become my sports blog.

(I am a huge sports fan)

After I am done with the marketing and editing of Deadman,

*found here

Please do not purchase the book, it needs to be edited.

But you can look at the awesome cover. Please leave comments on your opinions.

Anyway: after I am done with Deadman, I have about six books lined up to be write, including a NaNoWriMo novel, I plan on beginning as soon as November 1rst rolls around.

But they are all in the horror/science fiction genre. I would like to write a football novel, or a basketball one. I have ideas to both.

Anyway I need an agent, if you are interested in representing a zombie/vampire hybrid horror novel set in the late 1600’s in Salem Massachusetts, about a thief named Alaxender (No it’s not a misspelling its spelled like that.) who needs to team up with a local Vampire covenant to destroy an infectious army of blood thirsty zombie like killers, give me a call, or an email

I have a guarantee

an empty one.

If a horror agent read my book, they would represent me. But an agent never will, because I was a bonehead and queried 100 horror agents with a terrible query letter. Apparently once you query an agent, they are off limits for the book if they turn you down.

this one

This is going to be my writing blog exclusively